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It's natural to feel curious and a bit suspicious when you come across something unexpected, like a pair of black underwear, in your boyfriend's laundry. However, it's important to approach the situation calmly and open-mindedly before jumping to conclusions. There could be several reasons why he didn't show them to you first:

  1. Surprise gift: Your boyfriend might have genuinely wanted to surprise you with a thoughtful gift. He might have thought that showing them to you before washing would ruin the surprise.

  2. Embarrassment or shyness: Some people feel awkward or embarrassed when it comes to buying intimate clothing for their partner. He might have wanted to make sure they were clean and ready for you without drawing attention to it.

  3. Thoughtfulness: He might have wanted to wash them first as a considerate gesture, ensuring they were clean and fresh for you to wear.

  4. Miscommunication: Sometimes, miscommunication can lead to misunderstandings. Perhaps he did intend to show them to you but forgot or assumed you wouldn't mind.

  5. Personal preference: Your boyfriend might have thought that choosing a pair of underwear for you would be a sweet gesture, demonstrating his taste and care for you.

Given the situation, it's essential to have an open and honest conversation with your boyfriend about your feelings and concerns. Approach the topic in a non-accusatory manner and express your curiosity about the underwear's presence. Let him explain his reasons, and listen carefully to what he has to say. Communication is key in any relationship, and discussing your feelings and thoughts will help you both understand each other better.

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